Brainstorm!

So I've kind of figured out the biggest problem I'm going to have with my Japanese lessons.

Today I was practicing with David and managed to say everything pretty well and recognized the Hiragana 80% of the time. Tomorrow in the lesson I'm going to be a nervous wreck that won't be able to say the simplest of things let alone remember anything.

I think my biggest problem has always been my hearing difficulties, because I can't hear myself sometimes things don't come out of my mouth right (don't start) and it makes me sound completely stupid when actually... I'm not.

I'm now 24 and I still do this with my native tongue, I'm twice as worse with a foreign language but I've never been confident enough to ignore it. I know I do it, I worry about it and I after being told I'm stupid most of my life by teachers who thought speaking difficulties and hearing difficulties meant that people were idiots I don't like anyone thinking that now.

Tomorrow I'm going for my third lesson and not taking my mum, I'm hoping to sit next to the two people I was last week (or at least one of them) and I'm hoping that they'll kind of understand that I'm useless at this but not stupid.

The good thing is I am picking up Japanese quite easy, it is small footsteps obviously, I can only put together a few small sentences but I'm doing better than I ever did with French!

The problem tends to come when our teacher says "now in a group make a conversation up" and the lovely girl next to me turns around and says something and deep down I know what it is but my hearing starts to become patchy because I'm a bag of nerves and I stutter replies to her hoping I'm correct. I can't make a conversation up with my sister or mum without having it broken up and sounds stupid and now I'm doing it in Japanese with strangers.

Wish me luck for tomorrow!

Ohhh and reviews will all start on Thursday, I'm working tomorrow (then have my lesson) and I'm working Wednesday. I'll probably do a few Wednesday but the majority will be up on Thursday and DO NOT ask me where my Fairy Tail blogs are I haven't had a moment to myself recently what with panicing about my Guinea Pig, Japanese lessons and home work and work.

Hope everyone has a nice Tuesday!