Fed up and under appreciated

There are just some weeks that drain everything from you.

I have just had one of those weeks.

In fact one of those fortnights!

My assistant manager is a total idiot, he's basically spent the last two weeks trying to bully everyone around. That I can deal with, he's a prick, he wants to be the big man and because he's the new guy (and shit at his job) he takes it out on everyone else. Whatever, get over yourself.

But you'd think seeing as I'm basically spending the days being told how worthless and stupid I am my boyfriend of all people will be trying to build my confidence up?




Hell no.

He has this nasty habit of checking his Facebook every 10 seconds on his phone and when you call him out on it he says he's just checking to see if anythings happened. Well yeah someone did some interesting shit that took the last 10 seconds to do and posted it on Facebook for you.

He also gets obsessive over things he's doing. So last Sunday he went LARPing and all last week I had to listen to him go on and on about how fun it'll be and how great it is and how he's invited all his friends blah, blah fucking blah. THIS week his friend has invited him to dress up and go to Exeter Comicon on Sunday, so this week I've had to hear how wonderful Comicon will be and how fun it'll be spending time with Mark and how he went to see Mark on Friday blah,  blah fucking blah AGAIN!

I work Sundays, not that I really care, but I don't want to hear how wonderful your life is at the moment when I'm having problems at work. Especially when I'll say something nearly in tears and you'll look at me blankly and say "well at least this weekend will be fun" NO IT FUCKING WON'T! I spent 7 hours with Tragic today, even though I'm working with Jeannette tomorrow its still work for 5 fucking hours, can't you spend half a flippin' hour out of your busy week not checking Facebook or telling me how wonderful your life is and listen to me?

I've had about 2 compliments off of him before, if I ask him for a compliment (I know its stupid to do) he'll list off every nice thing he's ever done for me. So you want a prize for being a competent boyfriend? You might get one if once in a while you said something nice to me.

It is always a competition with him, one you can't win, and if you back him into a corner he'll blame his Autism and Asphergers. I'm sorry but right now that is just an excuse to not say something nice about someone.

And then he makes me feel guilty. So what I won't show you to the door after you ignored me for the last 5 minutes on your phone, so what I won't give you a hug goodnight, why the hell do I get treated like a bad person when you'd rather be checking your phone, or walking out to talk to someone on your phone or talking about how great your friends are?

I have two big decisions to make in the next few days.

1. Do I carry on at work?
I won't get JSA again for nearly half a year or something if I walk out but is 14 hours worth all the abuse I get?

2. Do I carry on with David?
Don't get me wrong I needed to rant tonight about him but he is a good boyfriend. He is so clueless but I love him.

I just feel so lonely without my friends anymore, I used to have so many (even if they where online) and now I hardly get to talk to them and we only ever seem to talk if there is a problem. It really sucks.